A man cuts himself shaving...fuck he thinks, I hope I don't get blood on my clean shirt. Note to self...best remember to remove the toilet paper from my chin before leaving the house.Being a man who has cut himself on a few occassions I can confirm that this is the normal thought process.
However I am not David Young of Crosshill in Fife, no siree!
You see Mr Young cut himself shaving but his thought process was probably a little more like this...Damn I've cut myself shaving. I do hope I don't get blood on my clean shirt. Hey (and you can almost see the lightbulb above his head) I wonder if I can find a shyster lawyer who will sue the manufacturer of this razor.
And you know the saddest part of this story...he actually did it! He launched legal action against Wilkinson Sword.
More bizarre still...Wilkinson Sword offered an out of court settlement of £6,500 ($11,000) and more baffling yet Mr Young knocked it back stating
"We think it is simply not enough. We think that considering the injury and the distress it has caused us we should be getting a lot more."
"We have spent £900 having the razor analysed (£900 for fucks sake. Consider the other things that could have been done with this £900) and our lawyer will take £3000 (This may be the only case I've come across where I'd actually like to see the lawyer increase his fees) of the £6500 as his fee."
And right there we can see the motivation for this farce. It's not about righting wrongs or sticking up for the little guy. Oh no this one appears to stem from one of the basest human instincts...greed!
The TWAT Davenelli opinion on this
If you are too fucking stupid to operate something as primative as a razor then why the fuck should the rest of the world financially reward you for your ineptitude?
I sincerely hope that this case now goes to court and Wilkinson Sword triumph with Mr Young ordered to apologise for raising such a worthless lawsuit. I'd also like the court to award costs to WS just for spite.
I will now be swapping my Gillette shaving gear for those of their rival as a show of solidarity. Further details on The Wilkinson Sword range can be found here...
As a footnote
I once cut my finger slicing bread...should I sue Sabatier?
Anyhoo...the whole "hilarious" article can be read at the link below...
3 comments:
It's terrible. I can't live like this.
Do you know, I actually tripped-up the other day. Yes, I wasn't really looking, but why should I?
The local council should provide a completly smooth transit system for those of us on foot. Some sort of Metropolis-style-thing. Because we can't possibly walk around on our own.
We might trip.
I mean, the paving slabs are not at all even. That's what the man from Claims Direct says. I saw it on daytime tv. Because I don't work. Because I've been signed-off on the sick. Because of my 'problems'.
I once found a bit of blue plaster (the kind catering types wear) in an Iceland sausage. I sent the bit of sausage back to them. They gave me a ten pound token, so I bought more sausages. I reckon I'd get one million pounds of sausagemeat if that happened now.
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